Sunday, May 27, 2012

Four Letters That Changed the World

So no one wants fried chicken on a Sunday afternoon.
Surprise, surprise.
Not really though, many fatasses skip church to eat chicken.
If they tip?
I don't give a sheet.
Our obesity problem < My monetary problem.

Throughout our history, many people have striven for democracy, a real consensus of the people.
These people generally didn't do shit.
Dickhead leaders and power hungry sociopaths were very successful in making that grand ideal living hell for it's supporters.

Then Al Gore invented the Internet.

I'm probably fucking wrong (like usual), but I believe the Facebook "Like" button is the greatest democratic tool in humankind's shitty existence.
While this may sound far-fuckin-fetched, stick with me here for a moment: what are some things true democracy always lacked?

No way to get all people involved?
Unless you don't have an internet connection, that's not the case.
And as we all know, that immediately invalidates any opinion.
Move somewhere that isn't Alabama.

No method of communication?
Considering Facebook can be used for anything from catching up with old friends to (more likely) creepily commenting on the 34th picture in some rando girl's album, that's clearly not the case.

A lack of issue integration?
Facebook is errywhere.
Fuck, it's #2 in the Alexa Internet Rankings and on every goddamn site.
I don't want to let people know I'm on, but Facebook doesn't give a shit.

Easy suppression of participators?
Heh, nice try.
Lonely nerds will do whatever they goddamn well please.
If they wanna bash the president, they will.
If they want to completely ruin a young girl's life, they will.
Amoral people suck ass but they're a necessary evil.

No impact from consensus?
Politicians, corporations, schools, etc. generally care about two things:
Money and their own ass.
Bless them for that, that's how the fuck capitalism works.
I choose not to pursue those two goals exclusively, but whatevs.
And while trying to attain those two goals, they need to make people like them and their product.
This is small problem due to their general shit-headedness.
What does liking shit on Facebook do?
It moves that story about Cambodian refugees to the top.
It let's people know that not only do they like the misspelled status that "girl who posts 15 hot pics a day" (who I don't think actually exists), they might get pissed about important shit.

Nothing else has made the elite and the masses connect more successfully, ever.
It's a digital way to make voices heard.

Perverted douchebaggy voices, but voices nonetheless.


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